(Not-so)Secret Talents

Let's face it: so much of life is getting up the courage to create the life we desire. So much of life, therefore, is getting out of our own way, ignoring that insidious voice inside, advising you to give up before you start, and instead, believing that you're worth the effort, because what you have to contribute is valuable...because you are valuable.

But once you get started, the process does get easier, and over time, it hardly becomes a process anymore. It becomes an act of liberation. This will surprise some of you sports fans, but when I originally started this blog, it was a top-secret blog. Only two or three humans, besides myself, knew about it. (The cats were indifferent.)

I would write something and my dear friends would read it and be supportive. At that time in my life, the idea that I had good, I'm sorry, FANTASTIC ideas which other people would pay U.S. currency for, was far too outlandish for me to seriously consider....and look at me now! Blogging about my business, my ideas, my vagina, my dating history, the orange Kitten...hmm, or are those all the same thing? Only my subconscious knows for sure. (Insert here the sound of many men thinking, "I really need to catch up on my reading right about now.")

So, let's say you, at home, have this "crazy" idea of creating a video resume, which you would post on LinkedIn and thus start creating the professional opportunities you desire. GO FOR IT! Use that smartphone or iPad for something actually smart and, while wearing a nice top, with your hair combed, maybe even some makeup, and a big, beautiful smile, give a 01:30 pitch about yourself and your professional passion. Let yourself sparkle.

Then, you can keep the video on your phone/iPad/whatever for as long as it takes you to get comfortable with yourself. Maybe you'll shoot 5 more. #livealittle Share your work with your "inner circle;" those friends and family, in whatever form, who truly love you (and thus love your deepest potential) and want you to be the amazing person you desperately want to be. You know who those people are: they're the people who take great photos of you, and nurture you and fight for you in a thousand different ways..even when you can't fight for yourself. I know you have those people, but if you're feeling poopy, welp, liking my Facebook page did get you a free consultation, right? Are you thinking what I'm thinking? OMG, send that video to me! I'd love it!

But, you freak out, it won't be perfect! Well, thank Jebus, since the last time I worried about being perfect was when I was anorexic and weighed 107 lbs. PS: I still "knew" I was fat. Sexy!

I don't want perfection; I want you to be your most authentic self. I want you to think you're awesome just the way you are! (Unless you're a fan of DooWop music. Sorry. I try to be supportive of everyone but seriously, I can't. I have standards. Oh, stop laughing: I do.) You know who wants you to be "perfect"? PEOPLE WHO HATE YOU! Because perfection is a lie, and it wastes your time, and thus your life. So if you need yourself to be "perfect" before you're able to emotionally invest in yourself...um, no me gusta.

How many wonderful things have been created through huge mistakes? True story: Woody Allen's masterpiece, "Annie Hall," came about because the editor re-edited the movie into what he thought was a much more organic version. Think of your favorite author, or actor, for example: they didn't start out as the star you admire, they had to grow into that person. Whom could you grow into, I wonder? (Also, is it too late for The Kitten to grow into a cat who isn't such a b*tch? For reals.)

Want some help unearthing those secret talents? Email me at carlotazee@gmail.com, and like my Facebook page, "Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta," for a free consultation.

 

 

 

So, here's Jenny looking pretty much fine as hell at last night's Grammys. And I'm posting this because, after having been at the gym this am, and seen the morning "news" shows go crazy about what a "natural" beauty she is...first, I laughed so hard I almost snorted blood and then I thought: seriously? Do we seriously need to put this "natural" shit on a photo of an actress/singer/whatever the f**k she is selling herself as today...doing her job? Seriously? Make no mistake kids: it's this woman's JOB to look this good. This is an advertisement. 

So, if this photo of JHo inspires people to hit the gym, and eat a little healthier and, in general, take better care of yourselves...then bueno. (Note: my lunch yesterday was a bag of gummi bears and some white w(h)ine. #nonjeneregretterien)

However, if, as is unfortunately far more likely, this photo makes you think how fat & crappy you look, please take a minute to understand that there was an army of stylists, make-up assistants, hair-dressers, personal trainers, chefs and nannys, to name but a few, behind this woman ending up looking this hawt. This is not simply "genetics," a little bit of two-sided tape and some damn squats. This is the result of thousands of dollars. I remember years ago reading someplace that Jennifer Aniston spends approximately $7k a month on her body, in the form of gym workouts, personal trainers, Yoga, Pilates, and the like. That figure should right there tell you everything you need to know about the "values" of Hollywood. Thank god no one's starving or dying or going without clean, drinkable water anywhere in the world. #deargod

 

Anyway, maybe you, unlike me, were not an anorexic in high school, and college. Maybe you, unlike many of us, accepted yourself inside and out years ago and think you're just peachy in every way. For the rest of us here on Planet Earth, I wanted to remind you that you should enjoy this photo for the advertisement(!) it is and not compare yourself because you won't win, you cannot win, you'll just end up feeling crappy and that truly is NO BUENO and a major frigging waste of your valuable time. And I'm sure if Marc Anthony were here, reading this blog, he'd agree 100%!

xo
C.