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Thursday, May 23, 2013

Because You're Worth It!

Ugh, I'm writing this with a miserable summer cold, gawd, before a very packed Memorial Day weekend kicks off (#sexy), so that's today's excuse for being poopy. Yesterday, it was due to not waking up next to Idris Elba. (Why does that keep happening??) In 5 minutes, it'll be due to this small, orange cat staring daggers at me and (melodically) whining. But, I digest.

I'm also getting ready to give this workshop: which is actually more about how networking is the answer to (almost) everything, and why the onus is on you to create the career you want. $20. Breakfast included. (I'm looking at you, Big Boy. The cats don't have the opposing thumbs to network.)

And in preparing for this workshop, I realized that a big part of networking is thinking that you have something valuable to offer friends and employers, and for you to think that about yourself, you have to value your accomplishments. Which reminded me of a story, Boys and Girls: gather 'round. When I was about 29--so, last year, clearly--I was freelancing at a certain notorious network here in NYC, and getting ready to move to another,somewhat less notorious but rather more incompetent network. (Wait, why did I leave TV again? A simpler time of screaming profanity at writers who missed deadlines, and throwing phones at moron reporters. No, no, I'm not crying, it's just so dusty in my lair.)

Anyhoo, I had been treated very well at Network A, as far as salary, hours and respect went. But because I was 29 and had no idea how the world was (somehow, the liberals at public TV are to blame for this), and having always made bank in TV, I took my lofty status for granted. When I say "lofty," I ain't kidding. I almost came to blows with a staff producer, and he was forced to apologize to me. Ahh, good times: I saved his groveling message and played it at parties. I would have put it on the Jumbotron TV in Times Square had I only had the know-how. Oh, don't give me that look: loving me means loving all of me.

So when I announced I was leaving, and the boss of the assignment desk--who, true story, is now a HUGE name in TV news--asked to meet with me...I didn't think, "Hmm, this guy is not one of your more easy-going people. Pretty tense, in fact. If he wants to meet with me, that's kinda huge. Maybe I should do my hair, and wear a nice suit, and think seriously about staying on here and what sort of long-term goals I might have." Nope. No, no: why the f**k should I have been at all intelligent? I just took it for granted. I took for granted the fact that someone of his magnitude would want to meet with me. Meanwhile, a colleague had shortly announced her resignation, and when she did, my immediate superiors essentially said, " Don't let the door hit you in the ass. Party at my place, b*tches!" But I still never put the pieces together. (Oy vey.)

Long story short, I had my meeting, and because I was a moron, I wouldn't take the salary and opportunity offered me and I went off to Network B where I spent about two years wondering what sort of pro-Nazi child molester I was in my past life, because why else would I end up working overnight for 3 (atrocious) news shows, cutting clips of, I swear to Yahweh, water-skiing squirrels. Eventually, my loves, I went to law school--insert the sound of millions of unemployed law school graduates snorting with bitter knowledge--and drove back and forth across this beautiful country of ours at least three times, with a cat sitting on my lap, and dated some crazy boys, and went to Graceland and started this business and a whole lot of other hot mess happened which I have mercifully forgotten.

But here's my point: Had I just valued all I had achieved in TV news, and how hard I had worked, I might have understood what respect my boss at Network A was showing me. And I would have respected him, and his time, and his offer because I would have respected myself. And maybe I would have left...maybe I wouldn't have. But I would have understood why my boss was treating me like an equal. A privilege he did not grand everyone.

So whenever clients say to me stuff like, "Well, am I supposed to just ask [fill-in-the-blank alumni/co-worker/friend/relative] for a favor?" No, it's not a favor, kiddo, you EARNED it. You showed up, worked hard, gave 100% and this is the way the world works. Read my lips: You are WORTH it!

If this is making you seriously think you should attend my networking workshop on June 29, 2013 for $ are correct and you should come on down! You don't even have to be an Indiana University alumni. As long as your checks clear, you're golden. Otherwise, you should like my Facebook page, "Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta," for a free consultation and email me, with your thoughts, concerns, rants, the whole enchilada.


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