"I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life--and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do."- Georgia O'Keeffe

I have a girl-crush of long-standing on the famously cranky Ms. O'Keeffe and her striking art. Check out Joan Didion's book of essays, The White Album, for one prickly woman's take on another prickly woman. (http://amzn.com/0374532079).  Anyway, before reading the above quote, Ms. O'Keeffe would have been the last person on earth I would ever have associated with fear.  But, of course, she was human. She also had to make her way to become Georgia O'Keeffe: the transformation didn't happen overnight.

I was thinking of her, because I went to a networking event last night, and I kept extremely well-educated meeting young women who were telling me of the various things they wanted to do and people they wanted to be when they grew up. And, aside from one wonderfully pretentious creature (...you know that level of pretentious, wherein you almost want to hug the person because they make you laugh so hard? Exactly.), I wish them all the best. I wish them all the courage to ignore fear, and figure out their goals, and go out and start the process of achieving those goals. I can't wish for them to never experience fear...since who am I to say that fear isn't sometimes the best motivator?

I guess my point being... fear is normal, fear is even natural. Experiencing fear is part of life. Giving in to fear, and losing the ability to achieving your dreams, on the other hand, should not be a natural or normal part of your life. Because while the more you do, the more you'll be able to do...the more you give in to fear, the more fear you'll experience. And the more you will lose to fear.

Want some help confronting those fears? Email me @ carlotazee@gmail.com, or like my Facebook page, "Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta," for a free consultation!

31Ways2GetItStarted™!: January 19, 2013

Day 19: Get Over Yourself...Seriously.

I know, the 19th was yesterday was but yesterday was a "helluva" day as Rick James used to say, so stop giving me that look before we have to step outside and finish this? Ya feel me? Okay, I'm a little grumpy. But today's "hint" to get over yourself--and I include myself 100% in this--came to me after I re-read Joan Didion's wonderful, Play It As It Lays, http://amzn.com/0374529949, a exquisitely-written look at ennui in 1960s/70s Hollywood, and troubling (sexual) relationships between men and women, and primarily the extended nervous-breakdown of anti-heroine Maria Wyeth. 

I read this book, originally, a few years ago, when I was going through a "rough time." At that point, the book really emotionally resonated with me, and I had tremendous sympathy for Maria. This time...well, this time I found myself wanting to smack quite a few characters and say, "GROW UP! Life's hard! You're sick of being treated as interchangeable sexual "talent" by the men in your lives? Finally, huh? Dump 'em! Get a job, volunteer, get a f**king skill and contribute to society and leave that wasteland!" (I told you I was grumpy.) I was especially impatient when one character, who is paid to remain married to her husband--a "fixer" type of person--gets into a fight with her husband over a girl they've both been "enjoying." Except, of course, the wife isn't enjoying any of this. She's doing this...oh, for a multitude of bad, cowardly reasons. And she says,"You started it." (Deep sigh.)

That exchange made me want to throw the book across the room. GROW UP!

Let me go on the record, again, and stress how highly I esteem Ms. Didion's prodigious talent, and her unrelenting emotional honesty: it's really an extraordinary book. Can't recommend it highly enough.  But the more pragmatic part of my brain--programed by years of Chekhov, and ambition and feminism and you know, taking responsibility for how I feel and live--just can't have a ton of sympathy for people who choose to wallow in the "misery" of living in Hollywood, instead of changing their lives. You do only get this one life. Them's the rules. It does seem rather juvenile to waste it feeling bad and being unhappy so as to torment your husband/lover(s), when, you know, not to be corny, but you could cut your losses and try to be happy. You could try. Like the rest of us, honey. Personally, I'd always choose to be corny and happy, over being melodramatic. (Many former mens, were they to read that sentence, would simultaneously say,"...since when??" Luckily, they're too busy being committed to their stupidity and youporn.)

Such is my rant. *stepping down from soap box* Let me know what you think in the comments section, and, as always, email me @carlotazee@gmail.com!