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Friday, January 25, 2013

31Ways2GetItStarted™!: January 25, 2013

Day 25: Come on in, the water's fine!

I write those words in Queens, New York, wearing leggings, a sweater, and sweatshirt, huddled in my apartment which is alternatively over-heated and frigid[1]…but the expression, while perhaps seemingly incongruous to the situation, is apt. At a certain point, in figuring out how and why you’re going to change your life, you have to stop thinking and just do. You have to stop looking and just leap.

Okay, some of you are vomiting in your mouth right about now, thinking I’m that perky chick you knew, and hated, in college who majored in women’s studies,[2] listened to Joan Osborne, for f**k’s sake, and wanted to save Tibet, and ate vegan cookies…wrong, wrong. Vegan cookies are especially wrong[3]. I did wear Birkenstocks in college because 1) they were comfortable, and 2) it was a women’s college, and 3) I was young and foolish. Now I wear Birkenstocks to piss off my dates.

I am the least crunchy person you’ll probably ever meet…but I am, possibly, the most optimistic person you’ll meet, so when I say, “Shut up and do it,” I say it with love[4] and because it’s true. I started this business knowing less than nothing[5], but I was desperate and determined…and look at me now! (Pause.) I mean, okay, don’t look right now, because I’m in sweats, and covered in cat-hair, but behind this squalor (and even more cat-hair) is a life of opportunity, because I just made a way.  I stopped thinking how, or worrying about figuring things out minute by f**king minute, and just did it. Basically, I gave up on being a perfectionist. It’s so tiring trying to be perfect and the limited energy I have needs to be spent on 1) nagging clients and 2) tormenting men[6].

My point being: Dive on in, the water’s fine! You’ll make it happen, and if you don’t, well something even better will work out. Want some help getting your toes wet? Email me, or leave me a note in the comments, or visit my Facebook page, “Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta,” for a free consultation.

[1] Sounds like my typical date! Thank you, ladies & germs.
[2] Don’t even get me started. I’m a woman myself; I don’t need to be studied.
[3]When I eat a cookie, I demand butter and possibly some lard—life’s short—and if some doe-eyed animal has to be sacrificed for said cookie…excellent!
[4] …meh.
[5] But still more than anyone who voted for Romney. Ha! Aww, Boo, don’t be like that…
[6] Yes, when it comes to boys, I am essentially 8 years old, so if I like a boy, I become very obnoxious. On the other hand, I also become very naked so it all works out in the end.

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