It's All Relevant

Or, at least, that's what we have to tell ourselves about our life experiences, otherwise we head down a dangerous road of deciding certain years were wasted and damning ourselves for being human. I was thinking about this yesterday, during a conversation with a client, who had had some truly amazing adventures in the Former Soviet Union, but was currently expressing serious hesitation about the wisdom of mentioning that period on LinkedIn, saying..."But wasn't it all too long ago?"

 Welp, I don't know about you, but I wouldn't be where I am, doing the things I'm able to, and planning my future if it wasn't for the things I did more than 5 minutes ago, i.e. my first job after graduating college. Who knew having furious anchors throw their sandwiches me, and having to call the Kremlin every morning to discreetly ask if Yeltsin was still alive, would present me with so many life lessons? (I need to trademark that sh*t and get on a t-shirt right. Now!)  So, my response to the client was: "It's up to you to present this experience in a way that potential employers can immediately "get" its relevancy." (That made the client roll her eyes, since she was hoping for the easy answer. So was Luke Skywalker and he ended up with his old man cutting his arm off, realizing he had made out with his sister.)

 Not that age-discrimination isn't a real issue. Only in America, would we simultaneously talk about "life experience," and yet seriously want to hire twenty-somethings for executive positions. Then these same companies are shocked, shocked that the kids come to work in flip-flops and blue nail polish and ask aloud who Yoko Ono is. (I have personally witnessed this. Since the person asking the question was a good-looking boy, I kinda brushed aside my outrage...and scruples. Oh well.)

I still stand by my answer. All experience can be relevant for your LinkedIn profile, and thus, by extension, your job-hunt IF you present it in a succinct, intelligible and relevant manner that makes readers of your profile and resume immediately understand what you've done, what you know, and how that knowledge can benefit their company.  So yes, you're going to have to:
1. Invest some time figuring out exactly what type of job you want in what industry;
2. Figure out what skills, education and accomplishments that industry values;
3. Identify the skills, education, experience and contacts you already have that are comparable and relevant;
4. Create a LinkedIn profile and resume that demonstrates your skills, education and accomplishments in a manner intelligible and relevant to said industry.

So, for example, if--dear God--I wanted to punish myself and return to network news, I'd have to completely rewrite my LinkedIn profile as to as focus on the networks I worked for, the jobs I held, the skills I learned ("Whining." "Threatening writers who miss deadlines." "Screaming at field producers." "Hanging up on moronic reporters who ask yet another stupid question while I'm attempting to meet my deadline." ). Thus, I'd build a profile which I could then show to my friends/acquaintances/ deadly rivals in TV news and use to get an interview. On the other hand, I'd gloss over, as much as possible, this period of being self-employed, since I know that it makes corporates antsy. I'd mention this business only as it serves to reinforce the "messages" I'm telling about myself in order to get hired; messages of self-reliance, initiative, intelligence, determination.

My point being, everything can be relevant...if you know what type of job you're after, and what that job entails, and what the industry values. (This, of course, is different from people who despite being in their 40s and 50s, seriously list, on LinkedIn, the jobs they held in high school, selling ice cream or working at a pretzel stand at the mall. I know I'm all about personal responsibility, but these are the people to blame for me going out on a Tuesday and having six margaritas on an empty stomach.)

 Want some help getting your LinkedIn profile relevant and timely and useful? Of course you do! Email me @carlotazee@gmail.com, and like my Facebook page, "Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta," for a free consultation.

xo
C.


  

31Ways2GetItStarted™!: January 30, 2013

Day 30: Be selfish!

I was discussing with a dear friend, earlier this week, the necessity of being selfish if you truly want to achieve anything great with your life, and she said something along the lines of, "I don't think of being selfish as the worst thing anymore. But when I was growing it, it was the worst insult imaginable." 

Now, as many of you, you dear good people who have suffered through this blog's focus on my cats, vagina, grumpiness, living in Queens, and bad dates--not necessarily in that order--you good people know that I was raised as an adored only child. If my mother had called me selfish, I would have probably been confused, and said,"I don't understand...as opposed to what?  You mean...it's not a good thing?" As an only child everything I saw--parents and pets included--was mine. ALL MINE! Even if I wasn't necessarily using it at that moment, or year, it was still mine, don't touch it, don't look at it, mine, mine, MINE! Oh what a precious bundle of joy I was. Especially when sleeping. 

I suspect that most of you probably didn't grow up in such a breeding ground for rabid megalomania (#suckstobeyou), and you got used earlier to, not only sharing, but not being selfish. Maybe, especially if you're women, you also got used to being pressured to be "nice" and put others first. Let's face it: civility is what makes the world go round. But if you want to achieve your goals, at a certain point, you have to be selfish. You absolutely have to be selfish because the pressure to give up, and go-along-to-get-along is intense. When I was starting out in TV news, I moved up the ladder very quickly because I truly wasn't interested in being nice, I was interested in making deadlines and getting my pieces on-air. The women who cared what people were saying about them...well, god bless them, they're probably covering local politics in Iowa on public TV. #therebutforthegraceofYahweh...

 If you're trying to change your life, you have to become obsessed. You have to be selfish in your energy, your time and your passion because unless you're 16 and doing a lot of speed, you're only going to have a certain amount of time and energy. And life tends to move quickly. Opportunities move even quicker. So,you're going to have to be selfish in believing that your goals are more important, to you, than making other people happy.  

Understand that I'm saying you'll have to be selfish, not unpleasant or cruel. I'm not referencing Paul Gauguin, for example, who abandoned his family to suffer in dire poverty, when he fled to Tahiti to paint...beautiful as his works are. No. I, for example, lost out on a lot in my single-minded pursuit of success, when I was in TV news.

My point is, have the courage to believe that your passions are worth the best of yourself. Don't waste yourself taking care of everyone else in your life and work, and then have nothing that is truly yours.  Because, here's the funny thing about being selfish...it can then make you even more generous in other aspects of your life. 

Want some help channeling your inner brat? (Oh, god is that fun!) Email me @carlotazee.com, or visit my Facebook page, "Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta," for a free consultation.

31Ways2GetItStarted™!: January 21, 2013

Day 21: Inauguration Special

Before we begin, come take a short trip with me down memory lane. Back in 2001, when I was still "living" in Washington, D.C.--a place where people will invite you to boring dinner parties, bragging, "...and we're expecting the Senator from Rhode Island!" Okay, I guess, whatever gets you through the night. But I'm from NYC, so why would I care? In fact, why would even someone from Rhode Island care? Short answer: They wouldn't.--and I was working in the bowels of the most glamorous, reasonable, fun, rewarding, intellectually-stimulating business in the world...TV news. #contradictioninterms 

Anyhoo, I was told that I had been chosen to be overnight assignment editor (sort of like a glorified traffic cop), on the night of W.'s first Inauguration. Now, having covered President Clinton for years, I was naturally thinking, "Inauguration = ka-ching, bitches," since Bubba was always always always 3 hours behind schedule, which meant we all went into overtime. At that time of irrational financial exuberance--and at that network--overtime started at $50.00. (My first year in TV news, my accountant shook my hand after he did my taxes, he was so impressed by how much money I had made. I was 26. Then, he told me how attractive he found Latinas. Okey-dokey. Pretty sure I said something like,Well if I run into any, I'll be sure to let them know! #Zimmermanout) 

So, here I am, sauntering into the newsroom--think of a CIA "black site" secret prison, but without the charm--excited by all the cash I'm going to make.  http://youtu.be/zUKCVH67fWo

I swear to god that W. was in bed and the press pool dismissed by 10:30 that night. My shift lasted until 12am. Hence: No overtime. Hence: Rage. Tremendous rage and frustration and cursing. Ohh, Yahweh bless the dear, sweet faces of the D.C. press corps tonight...those hacks are going to need it!  

In light of today being both a kinda special day for President Obama and Martin Luther King, my hint is: Have a dream, but have the courage to make it happen. You and I are reaping the rewards of people who came before us, with tremendous dreams. And with amazing personal courage to take the risks to make those dreams come to life. Almost unimaginable courage. 

I Have A Dream 

Email me @carlotazee@gmail.com, or go crazy in the comments or visit me on Facebook: "Carlotaworldwide Creativity Yenta!"

31Ways2GetItStarted™!: January 15, 2013

Day 15: Worry Less, Do More!

Contrary to popular belief, I do not have telepathic powers, nor the ability to divine the future. I know: I am also disappointed. Still coming to grips with my inability to control world history. I haz a grumpy.

I state this because quite a few clients ask me, “Is this going to work, are you sure this is going to work?” Um. At this point, I’m only sure only that I’m not sure of anything…oh, excepting Jodie Foster’s sexual orientation. I was sure of that a loooong time before this past weekend’s Golden Globes. Jodie’s “acting” never really put that fact into doubt, if you know what I mean. #meowmeowmeow…meow!

But no, in the larger scheme, I’m not sure that anything is going to lead to anything, except to death and taxes. And cats. Probably, definitely more cats. When I started this business, I certainly wasn’t sure of what the hell I was doing, but I was sure that I did not want to continue working as a bartender, or return to TV “news,” or, dear god, practice law. So, I kept on doing what I could, read business books, found myself business mentors, and, most importantly, helped clients as best I could. I didn’t exactly know what I was doing, but I knew what I didn’t want to do, so by avoiding that and focusing on what I knew…tah-dah! It kind of worked, and I learned more things, got more momentum and look at me now! *shrugs*

I am also sure that people who constantly question themselves, and worry that they’re not doing things “right” are never going to succeed because they are their own worst enemies. If you’re spending more time texting me to ask, “Is this going to work?,” instead of doing the work I assigned you, and making productive choices…where is that going to lead you? That’s why today’s hint, is Worry Less, Do More. The more you do, the more you’ll be able to do. Conversely, the more you worry, the more you’ll see everything that can go wrong. And where does that lead you?

We’re fifteen days into 31Ways2GetItStarted™!...and if nothing else, just keep it going. You’ve made it this far, why stop now? At the end of the day, the people who succeed aren’t the smartest, or sexiest or bravest. The people who succeed aren’t even the people who deserved it most. They’re just the ones who continually mustered their courage in the face of doubt, fear, despair, indifference and other obstacles, and kept trying. They didn’t ask, “Is this going to work?” because they knew that the answer is, and always will be: “Yes…if you make it work.”

So, get back to work! But if you need some help, email me @carlotazee@gmail.com!

I think that bad jobs are like bad relationships in that, no matter how frustrated you are, if you want them to improve, you still have to put in the time and effort. In fact, if you want to escape from either into something better, you definitely have to put in the time and effort. I speak from personal experience here.
A number of years ago, when I was still employed in the (cough cough) "glamorous" and "sexy" world (translation: HAHAHAHA) of TV news (#contradictioninterms), I was working overnight, putting three shows on the air and ignoring the fact that my long-term relationship was in its final dregs. How much of a sexy party was my life!
Waking up at oh, 11pm to be at work by 1am--after the network had yanked our car service, so riding the subway at midnight--to put three fairly unwatchable news shows on the air, all the while, lucky me, "dating" someone whom I no longer had any interest in, and nothing in common with. Dating someone whom, not only did we bore each other...we pretty well disliked each other. Party!
To say I had a bad attitude at that point in my life, is similar to saying that Hitler wasn't super fond of Jews. I was deeply cranky. And I felt that everyone I worked with should experience my crankiness. (Meanwhile, at work, I had been "promoted" because my superior had a heart-attack between shows, so as the EMT team was working him over...you know, to keep the guy alive... the executive producer yelled at me to take over, dammit, what the hell are you waiting for, Carlota? I say, "promoted" because I got a ton more work, but no more money or a better title.)
On top of this hot mess, to make sure that my career would really take off, I would trudge in wearing...oh, sweatpants, sneakers, no makeup. Or, stretchy pants and Birkenstocks. How sexy was I! Yeah, maybe not so much.
If you're read this blog before, you know how this story ended: law school, law school debt, break up, skin-tight jeans, happily ever after.
But happily ever after doesn't just happen. And my point is, while I just wanted to get the hell out...there was another way. I also could have, simply, changed my attitude, changed my wardrobe, broken up with that boy...and re-worked my career. I could have put in the time and effort to staying in TV, and fixing my relationship with my employer. I could have stopped being the wicked witch of the west's BFF. I could have had a single non-passive-aggressive conversation with the then-boyfriend, and ended it. #crazy!
For me, honestly, years later...I wouldn't trade a thing.
But if you're reading this at home, and thinking about how you'd like to improve things in your own personal/professional life, and perhaps be slightly less dramatic (#insane) about it...you're going to have to start working on your relationships. Today. Right now. You're going to have to clean yourself up, and demonstrate a positive attitude. You're going to have to invest in solving problems. You can't allow yourself to wallow, you have to fix it. And that seems somewhat counter intuitive, right, since, when you hate your work, or your boyfriend, all you want to do is wallow. Why would you bother to dress up when the boy never notices, right? Why work late when the boss never acknowledges all the hard work? Because, and here's the point: you have to change your mentality. You have to be the one who notices. You have to start thinking differently to improve or even escape your situation. And "thinking differently" won't just happen...it's like inspiration, sometimes you have to jump-start it. "Thinking differently" won't just happen, but wallowing in self-pity, and all of the inherent destructiveness will. You can waste years that way. Years you won't get back. Don't do it; it's not a hot look.

Want some ideas about how to start thinking differently? Email me @carlotazee@gmail.com! 

"Sentence structure is innate but whining is acquired."- Woody Allen

I promise I'm not whining. (If I was whining, trust me: you'd know. That sound would get in your brain and you'd want to kill me and probably yourself so as to liberate yourself from my dulcet tones...ha.) But recently, I kinda got, figuratively at least, punched in the solar plexus. It was especially disturbing because I never anticipated it. Never saw it coming.
But, I'm a big girl, and after surviving TV news, Russia, law school, Queens, The Kitten eating items in my purse, various ex-mens, etc...well, it really takes a great deal to knock me down. I mean, if you can survive multiple Russian winters, you're golden. (Hitler couldn't...and we all know how that ended.) So, I had my little pity party, I felt a little bad for myself...and then that got boring and I moved on. (As a friend would say: " I rose above it all, on my broomstick!")
The person who gave me the punching? Well, I never let on to them how painful I found their actions to be.I simply killed them with kindness, as the saying goes. So when they, shortly thereafter, sent me a sincere apology, I brushed it off: no harm done! (Did not feel the need to mention that I had been sincerely hoping the NYPD would pepper-spray them.)
Because, in reality, there was no harm done. After years of feeling at loose ends in my life, and in my work, I've finally figured out some very important things about myself, my life, etc. I've gotten my sh*t together. It's awesome. (Exhausting but awesome.)
So now, do you really think I'd give any person that power over me? I "ha" in your general direction. You don't want to help me? Fine. Go with God, live your life, etc. At this point, I could lose all physical ability, and only be able to blink out the letters of the alphabet and I'd get the job done. It would be brutal. It'd be extremely un-fun for all involved...but it would happen.
I'm not writing this to show off what a bad-ass I am...but to hopefully make you good people out there, who might be going through the same thing, start thinking the same thing about your own passion and determination.  

Life a funny thing...

One of the many reasons I started this business--besides the fact that the cats still refuse to work--is my fascination in figuring people out. It must be the voracious reader in me, but I'm always brooding about people's motivation. And not just in the, "Kim Kardashian really thought that marriage was going to work? Seriously?," sort of way, because, come on, people: she's an entertainer. She's a celebrity: that 'marriage' was theater and it did exactly what it was scripted to do. It made her and the soon-to-be-ex-hubby even more money, and even more (in)famous. What is, in my opinion, far more disturbing, is all the chatter on the Interwebs by apparently very credulous and under-employed people who take her "life" seriously and are deeply engrossed in her sprayed-on drama. These are the same people, one assumes, who don't have much of a sense of humor and who carefully read "Cosmo" articles for the insight. (Difficult to even type the words "insight" and "Cosmo" in the same sentence.) Ugh. So, I'm not losing sleep over Kim, but if she wants to hire me, I do have some availability.

No, I'm more interested in the motivation of real, actual thinking human beings. And I guess when I say 'motivation,' I mean interior life. The fact that people do, to quote Mr. Whitman, 'contain multitudes.' Some people assume that I get hired only by people in decline and crisis. People who need to be talked down off the ledge. Actually, I get hired by people whom on paper, or at least on Facebook, live enviable lives...but inside, they know that something's missing and they're searching for the courage and guidance to improve their situations.

It reminds me of one of my last jobs in TV, when I was working overnight for oh, a certain network, producing news segments for three shows. My shift was midnight to 9am. It was a wee bit stressful, in the sense that, for example, I was promoted from associate producer to operations producer, when my immediate superior had a heart attack in his chair during a show. And, as the EMT team worked to get breathing, my executive producer screamed at me to take over since we still had two other shows to get on the air. TV news, like Moscow, does not believe in tears. So I was 30, I was managing teams of editors and producers for three national news shows...as a friend said, I was "living like a rock star." Who'd ever want to leave this fabulous life?

Hmm, and yet here I am, engaged in the decidedly un-sexy daily grind of building a business that truly helps people...and I've never been happier or more fulfilled.